Ramblings

Craving for Cigarettes?

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Officially, I’m a scientific person. In my high school days, I tend to look at the latest development man can make and be awed with technology. I broke the PC at the principal office once and I was banned from putting my fingers on the keyboard for the remaining months of the classes. When it comes to health, I was more curious.

How did they manage to get in that shape or how awful a lung will look like when one person smokes? I didn’t learn to smoke in high school and that time I don’t plan to either. I was just the next old school model boy for two consecutive years with no vice attached to my habits.

It changed in 2003 when I took a summer class in Aklan Catholic College. I enrolled in a subject I barely know a soul as my classmate and all I did was to sit in the class say hi to my professor and sit my ass on the Kalibo Plaza waiting for the next period to come.

Thanks to my dragon mouth pals and ever supporting activist comrades I learn the art of puffing. I just can’t refuse the offer of putting my then blackening lips to the enticing look of the cigarette filter. Who else can refuse one when all you have in your side are smoking that cancer-causing fellow.

Then it started. One stick a day to three and I began to budget at least P 30 a day ($0.61444) for a pack of Phillip Morris for seven long years.

Smoking makes me skip breakfast sometimes lunch. Not that I am so poor to afford one but I just have so much of my addictiveness to my PC that I can stop tinkering my keyboard, despite the fact that my stomach wants to kill me already. Moreover, I contentedly feel it’s just normal to stay at home for two weeks in a row talking to myself and the PC monitor with literally no social life to speak of.

And since it was that time where my urge to write “basted” poems and leftist propaganda starts to kick in and I needed a catalyst to make my brain idle because I easily get lost focus and distracted with so many things and chicks to think.

Smoking lessens my tension, makes my mind at ease with the universe and my body relaxed. Essentially since I tasted no illegal substance in my 28 years of hermit life, the cigarette serves as my vice but it’s keeping a big dent on my pocket.

Next post I will discuss how I stopped smoking and what/who urge me to stop for good.

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